


A Novel Form of Defense

by Bobcatmoran



Category: Les Misérables - All Media Types, Les Misérables - Victor Hugo
Genre: Battle Pillows, Gen, baby battle pillows
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-13
Updated: 2014-10-13
Packaged: 2018-02-20 23:28:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 864
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2447015
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bobcatmoran/pseuds/Bobcatmoran
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bahorel's battle pillows are shocking in more ways than one. Joly tries to assist.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Novel Form of Defense

**Author's Note:**

> This was written in response to a prompt from [PilferingApples](http://archiveofourown.org/users/PilferingApples/pseuds/PilferingApples). As for the battle pillows, they're the brainchild of [Tritonvert/NeedsMoreResearch](http://archiveofourown.org/users/tritonvert/pseuds/tritonvert), and I promise to put everything back where I found it when I'm done.

"Oh my sweet deity, they’re adorable!" Joly paused in the doorway to Bahorel’s rooms, hands over his mouth and delight suffusing his face.

"Yes they are, only about a week old, now quick, get inside and shut the door," Bahorel told him. "That one with the green ticking is fast and a regular escape artist."

Joly did as he was told, and then joined Bahorel on the large rug in the middle of the room, where a litter of tiny pillows frolicked. One of them attempted to pounce on Joly’s knee but fell short. “Aw, here little guy,” Joly said, trying to pet it. It dodged and nibbled at Joly’s glove. 

"Actually, that one’s a ‘little gal,’" Bahorel said. "And don’t worry, they’re still too small to actually do any damage to fabric."

"It’s female? How can you tell?"

"You can’t, actually, until they reach maturity. I’m just pulling your leg. Not about the fabric thing, though. Their jaws can’t handle anything much bigger than stray threads right now." 

Joly’s hat, which he had set on the floor next to him, started scooting across the room. Bahorel raised his eyebrows and picked up the hat, revealing a small green pillow underneath. He sighed and picked up the pillow. “What am I going to do with you?” he addressed it. 

"They’re quite the handful right now, aren’t they?" Joly said, holding out his hands for the green pillow, which Bahorel passed over.

Bahorel shrugged. “I just wasn’t expecting any of mine to be of breeding age yet, so this,” he gestured around the room, “wasn’t exactly something I was prepared for. But here now, I wanted you to take a look at one of them…if I can find it.”

"What does it look like?" Joly asked.

"Deep blue ticking, of a fabric I don’t recognize, and smaller than the rest. The others don’t like it, so it tends to hide."

"Don’t like it? Whyever not?"

"Because it — well, you’ll see soon enough. Come, help me search for it."

After looking nearly everywhere else in Bahorel’s cluttered rooms, the pillow was located behind a sofa cushion. “Oh, it’s so tiny,” Joly said, reaching for it. “Heavens, it could fit right in my — ow!” He jerked his hand back as he received an audible shock. “I suppose that’s why the other pillows don’t like it?”

"Most likely. You can pick it up now. It only does that attacking thing once. Do you have any idea what it is? It’s like getting jabbed with a needle, only it makes that sharp cracking noise."

"Electricity, I would imagine," Joly said. "It certainly felt like a shock, like that caused by a buildup of frictional electricity."

“‘Frictional electricity?’”

"Like what you get when you rub certain materials against one another. Remember that time Combeferre brought in that glass rod and ran his silk handkerchief along it and made Enjolras’ hair stand on end?" Joly stroked the pillow. "This little one, it doesn’t quite feel like silk but something similar that perhaps is able to build up an electric charge with a greater variety of surfaces. It’s the discharge, the electricity quickly flowing from one place to another, that causes that jolt."

"It happened in a darkened room once, and looked nearly like the pillow was emitting a minature bolt of lightning," Bahorel recalled.

"It is, in a way. Doctor Franklin did an experiment that proved that lightning was a form of electricity."

"So is there any way to stop it?"

"Do you want to? It seems an effective defense mechanism, which seems, er, apt, for one of your pets."

"Yes, but I am worried about its socialization. It’s currently ostracized from the others." 

"Hm." Joly sat back in the sofa, petting the pillow as it snuggled against his leg. "Could you possibly train it to touch a metal surface before interacting with others? I sometimes build up frictional electricity, particularly in the winter, and found that by touching a doorknob or anything else metal, I avoid shocking people."

"Perhaps that training could come with time. But you have no more immediate solutions?"

"You might try keeping a pot of water on to boil? I have noticed that frictional electricity is hard to generate when the weather is damp, and if the air in your rooms is more humid…"

"Then there might be less of the electricity generated by the pillow."

"Precisely."

"Well, I shall have to give that a try, and I will of course let you know how it progresses. Thank you kindly, Joly, you were entirely more helpful than Combeferre."

"Oh?"

"Well, no offense to you, but I went to him first, and he got all excited and started going on about some sort of fish. No help whatsoever."

"Electric fish?"

"Do not mistake me, I love the man dearly, but he has some of the oddest interests, and it all sounded quite chimerical to me."

"Mm. There is an eel in the Americas that they say can send such a jolt that it would kill a man."

"Joly?"

"Yes, Bahorel?"

"You may wish to stop petting that pillow. Some of your hair is standing on end."

**Author's Note:**

> Tiny Blue Pillow has polyester ticking, which is why a) Neither Joly nor Bahorel could ID the fabric (the early 19th century being well before an era of synthetic fabrics), and b) why it managed to generate terrific amounts of static electricity. Natural fibers are not very good at building up a static charge when they’re rubbed against one another, but a polyester-cased pillow, inching along a wool carpet or other surface covered in plant or animal-based fabric, would be pretty darn good at it. 
> 
> Frictional electricity was an early term for static electricity, coming from the fact that it was discovered as it was generated via friction, rubbing two materials together, a la Combeferre with his glass rod and silk handkerchief. 
> 
> Doctor Franklin is, of course, Benjamin Franklin, who, in addition to his famous experiment with the kite in a thunderstorm (kids, don’t try this at home!) managed to nearly kill himself once while trying to use electricity to kill and cook a turkey. (kids, also don’t try this at home!)
> 
> Physics is Not My Area Of Expertise, so I apologize for any inaccuracies ~~and blame them on Joly, early 19th century science, and his possibly incorrect understanding thereof.~~
> 
> Electric eels and other fish that use electricity have been known about since ancient times, and were used for various medical therapies by the ancient Greeks, Romans, Chinese, and some Amazonian tribes. Odds that Joly has at some point taken inspiration from this: very good.


End file.
